Saturday, 7 January 2012

Somebody addressed me correctly!

It's taken about a year, but finally somebody got it right. It's amazing really, because there are more choices of  formal address that are acceptable, than those that aren't. So he's the list of what is okay:-

Vicky - because it's 2012 for fucks sake. Besides, I really don't need a title or want to be address formally.

Mrs Caramel - Because I'm married.

Ms Caramel - Because this is also a correct modern title which doesn't reference marital status.

M'am, Ma'am, or Madam - This is how you address a woman when you don't know what her status or title is.

Almost acceptable:-

Domina or Maîtresse - It kinda says what I am, but it's not all that I am.

Mommy - Get to know me first! Sums the whole thing up really, what you call someone when you have a relationship can be any of the above, or below. But not till you are in a relationship with them.

And here's what isn't acceptable:-

Mistress - Technically speaking it is correct. But in modern English has been superseded by  Miss, Ms Mrs. Can still be used for the head of a household or school. But in common usage the word usually means a kept woman, which I am not.

Miss - This is the formal address for children and young unmarried women. While male children earn the right to become a Mister at age 18, women aren't considered grown-up until they marry. If I was role playing a 25 year old school teacher, I might put up with it, but I don't. I don't find it insulting to be called Miss, I just think the person using it is ignorant.

Lady - I can be a gentlewoman and lady-like, but I never married a Duke. This is as dumb as calling yourself Princess.

Queen - of what? I do know a few queens, but...

Goddess - Oh for fucks sake, come on!



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Regarding male titles, 'Master' is how you address a child, unless the person has some specific role, occupation or qualification. As far as I know, nobody is awarding accredited qualifications in BDSM, so the title can't be anything but pretentious.

The correct form of address would be Mister (Mr.) or Sir. But 'Sir' shouldn't be used as a prefix to the name, unless Sir happens to have a knighthood. Nor is he likely to be a Lord, or a Baron and if he is calling himself something like Dungeon Master, he is definitely a complete knob.